Adiksi

A quick but long post. Aku nak membebel sekejap, lama dah ni pendam tp tak terluah. Let me just put it words hoping this will ease the heart a bit. Stupid heart, by the way.

I actually hate the fact that I always choose wrong timing to fall/to open back my heart. Wrong timing sucks. I should just go back to basic,-- heartless. Seems like no problem at all.

Gaah. Benci. Aku tak tahu apa rasa ni. Macam annoying gila weh. Rasa yang macam aku macam la nak try bukak hati for that particular someone (and yes, this is like out of sudden, bangun bangun tidur rasa macam ni) tp lepastu end up maacam ohh org dah taknak dah. Am i too late or its just not meant to be? Heh. Kekadang lelaki ni memang susah dapat hint kan ataupun aku yg tak reti bagi hints? Oh well, either way, I think for this time around, that is just that kot. Should not even open your heart la na. Wrong timing. And aku pulak bukan jenis yang nak cuba berminggu minggu. Haha.

Bila fikir fikir balik, should i accept the last time? But, I dont think so. Skrg baru nak lembut hati. Like I said, i need probably a year to really figure out myself/ready for next rship. Turn out 1 year is too short to wait. And. I dont say I am completely 100percent pun opening my heart, but I think its a start to even think to open my heart.
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But, hell. Maybe I shouldnt. Lets just keep back being heartless and tak payah fikir pasal apa apa dah. Or tgk last seen whatsapp lepastu stress sendiri. Hahaha. Benci.

Okay. Got to go back to work. Skarang tgh ada satu jerawat besar kat pipi. Gila insecure. Rasa macam taknak jumpa sesapa -.-'' bye.